Reviewed by Christopher Armstead |
|||||||||||||||
Well here we go again. A group of randy young adults take a trip to Mexico, I think they are trying to get to Cabo or someplace, because they are amateur porno performers. Of course they could have, and probably should have shot this porno film in somebody’s back yard, but then we wouldn’t have gotten the chance to spend all of this quality time with these obnoxious individuals as they sped down a dusty Mexican road. Who exactly are we traveling down the road with? There’s Alphonse (Adam Huss) who is the obnoxious mastermind of this shoot, there’s Steve (Jeremy Radin) who is the obnoxious fat funny guy who actually owns the camera they will be using for this little porno masterpiece, there’s porno performer Dallas (Lelyla Milani) who looks very good in her tight tank top and sadly didn’t sign a nudity waiver for this flick, there’s porno performer Debbie (Margaret Scarborough) who did sign a nudity waiver, we also have her brother Jimbo (Zach Bennett) who stays high and apparently owns the van that we are driving and lastly we have Daisy (Catherine Wreford) who is passed out drunk on the floor of van, but we are guessing she should revive herself when the Porno Camera starts to roll and it comes time to die. So in an amazing plot twist that we’ve never seen before ever our heroes make a wrong turn and are heading down a lonely dusty road lost as hell, but fortunately, in another amazingly unique plot thread they run into a old gas station owned by a freaky gas station dude (Irwin Keyes). He tells our kids about a ghost town called La Sangra de Dios or something that they should be avoided at all costs. Steve is all geeked now because he is a huge Luchador fan and knows of the legend of this town and how they locked up the legendary Luchador El Mascarado who went nuts a killed all of his opponents, and then killed everybody in this town for whatever reason. So the freaky gas station dude tells them not to go, but our heroes shoo-shoo that loon as the car breaks down right in front of the ghost town and thus they figure this is as good a place as any to shoot a porno flick. |
|||||||||||||||
Now it’s time for our porno shooting youths to get to dying. The drunk Daisy has to run outside to barf and she like runs what seems to be three miles out of way to do this, which is odd but of course, but this makes it easy for El Mascarado to kill her and have our youths walk around in a daze asking ‘where’s daisy’. She’s dead you idiots. Soon, one by one, our crazy crew of amateur porno producers are getting silenced by the crazed masked luchador, who is ripping the faces of folks because apparently that’s what luchadors are supposed to do. However there is one way to stop this wrestling maniac, and to that end we wish those cats good luck with that. As you can obviously see ‘Wrestlemaniac’ or as it was originally titled, ‘El Mascarado Massacre’ is exactly swimming in a sea of originality here. However we do like Lightning Entertainments choice of changing the title as that alone made me throw it my rental cue. ‘Wrestlemaniac’ is so painfully unoriginal in its setup and its characters so obnoxious that it is actually a struggle to keep from turning it off, but what I think that director Jesse Baget is hoping for is that you struggle along with the severely tired narrative and also hopes that the couple of boobs he tosses your way keeps you marginally interested until El Mascarado comes along, and hopefully the one thing that IS original about ‘Wrestlemaniac’ will carry us along the rest of the way. Fortunately for us when El Mascarado does show up on the scene and start killing these crazy kids, the story does rise above its suspect beginnings and almost becomes somewhat entertaining. Of course it’s the typical run chase and kill routine that all slashers have within their little narratives but Baget, who also wrote the script, gave the character of El Mascarado a decent, if not somewhat totally ridiculous history for why he is the way he is, he keeps the flick moving at a decent pace and once the murders get on the way and our characters who were so irritating when they were merely existing become much more palatable running screaming and dying. One of the problems with the film is that El Masacarado is kind of doing us a community service here and as such we aren’t very scared by his popping up here and there killing these kids. ‘Wrestlemaniac’ isn’t a very good movie with its unoriginal setup and loathsome characters but it does manage to improve as it goes along and almost ends up being entertaining. Almost. |
|||||||||||||||