Between the three of them, as of today, they
are two hundred and twenty two years old. I mean Alan
Arkin, Al Pacino and Christopher Walken are so old I had to
pull up Calc to do the math on how old they are. And if
I added in Mark Margolis who plays the villain in this movie
'Stand Up Guys', we'd be pushing hard against 300 years worth
of old man. There are some seriously old dudes in this
movie. But gosh darn, these old dudes really, really
know what they are doing and we appreciated them an awful lot
in this movie.
After 28 years in state enforced bondage, Val (Pacino) is
finally being released to the world. There to pick Val
up from prison is his best friend in the whole wide world, Doc
(Walken). We can tell within in minutes of meeting Val
that the old dude is a bit of a handful. He complains
about Doc's crap apartment, he complains about Doc not having
Cinemax, and he's drinking Doc's aftershave. Hell if I
know why he's doing that as there have to be easier and safer
ways to get a buzz. While Val is whining incessantly,
Doc has a gun behind his back like he's going to shoot Val,
but other than the fact that Val is a bit annoying, why would
Doc want to shoot his best friend? Hmm….
I imagine if a man has been in jail for almost three decades,
even if this man is in his seventies, he might want a little
action and this leads Val and Doc to the home the Madam Wendy
(Lucy Punch). Unfortunately things on us men tend to
deteriorate with age, but fortunately for us men they have
fixed this problem this since Val has been in prison, and
since these old dudes are career criminals, they know how to
effortlessly break into places to acquire erectile dysfunction
drugs free of charge. And I've priced that stuff and it
is damned expensive. Not that I need it because you
know... let's move on.
Thus we have the first act of 'Stand Up Guys'
which consists of Doc dealing with his unstable friend and
showing him a good time, which is probably the weakest part of
this movie because even though Walken and Pacino are great
actors, they can only carry a film featuring them
doing not much of nothing only so far.
But eventually we learn why Doc might want to shoot his good
friend and we also swoop by the old folks home to pick up
Hirsch the Wheelman (Arkin), and this about the time that that
'Stand Up Guys' starts to find it's groove and we the audience
begin to figure out what kind of movie this is supposed to
be.
Now we have three really old dudes loose in the city,
carousing the whorehouse yet again, running from the cops,
shooting people in the kneecaps, helping damsels in distress
and ultimately trying to figure out a way out of a really bad
situation. In case you're curious, the kind of bad
situation these old cats are in… there's really only one way
out.
So I'm thinking, as I'm watching director Fisher Stevens movie
'Stand Up Guys,' that the producers first found a way to round
up Walken, Pacino and Arkin for their movie then eventually
got around to figuring out what kind of movie that they were
going to actually put them in. And I'm seriously
thinking they might not have actually settled in to figuring
this out until halfway through the shoot. This dynamic
does give 'Stand Up Guys' the feeling that it lacks some focus
early on, director Stevens relying on the fact that
Christopher Walken and Al Pacino are universally awesome and
that an audience will be entertained just watching these two
veterans of the game simply interact, and while this first act
does have its moments… how could it not… it still was kind of
meandering and not going anywhere in particular.
But as I mentioned earlier, as the actual plot started to kick
in, as rudimentary as it might've have been, 'Stand Up Guys'
becomes much more cohesive and almost irresistible. Or
maybe this was when Alan Arkin showed up, who as the oldest of
the old dudes in the movie added a touch of 'maturity' to the
film. Now the film is still kind of meandering, and
there's still no real focus to anything these three old dudes
are doing during this one night, but for whatever reason
hanging out with them has become infinitely more fun.
And it's not lost on us that the subsequent acts include a cop
car chase, shootouts and a naked chick in the trunk of a
car.
All this verbiage is simply to say that 'Stand Up Guys' was
probably a success the minute the last old dude signed on the
dotted line. It is flawed, and there are times
when one might question whether or not this is even an actual
movie and not just a glorified one act play reunion of old
actors, but for this movie viewer, 'Stand Up Guys' ultimately
delivers the goods.
