Reviewed by

Christopher Armstead

Werewolves and Vampires.  When all else fails just make a movie about Werewolves and Vampires and it will be all good.  If you’re lucky and your name happens to be Len Weisman then make a movie about both, stick Kate Beckinsdale in it then claim her as your own when production wraps.  Right about now it doesn’t suck to be Len Weisman I’m thinking.  Canada, which has long been a favorite place to shoot Hollywood movies and pretend that it’s something other than Canada has apparently had enough of this and are making films that actually take place in Canada such as the Werewolf flick ‘Skinwalkers’.  ‘Skinwalkers’, while breaking no new ground for Werewolf genre, is at least an entertaining little film.  And if I’m director James Isaac, I would have taken a note from Len Wiseman’s ‘book of game’ and see if he could have laid a claim to the female lead in his film, Rhona Mitra, and claim her as his own.  At least that’s what I would have done.


Somewhere in some remote little village, twelve year old Timothy (Matthew Knight) is having awful nightmares about impending doom which only serve acerbate his list of medical maladies, the most problematic being his asthma.  His SMOKING hot widowed mom Rachel (Mitra) is concerned about the well being of her boy but the folks in this tiny town, which includes Rachel’s brother in law Jonas (Elias Koteas) and her mother in law Nana (Barbara Gordon) are incredibly helpful and caring, even though there is something a little strange about these folks.  You see there is a marauding group of chopper riding Werewolves led by one Varek (Jason Behr) who are looking for a mysterious boy who is on the verge of turning 13.  No one knows exactly what’s going to happen when this boy turns 13, but they know in some kind of way it means the end of the Lycanthrope as we know them, and Timmy’s dreams are forecasting all of this.

It would appear in this particular reality that there are two kinds of Lycans, those that like to eat people and those that would rather not.  Apparently being a werewolf and eating people is a lot like sex in that once you try it out, you got to have it over and over again and you will kill anybody who tries taking that right away from you.  Or privilege I suppose as I guess no one has a right to sex or eating people.  Regardless, the people eating werewolves want this boy found and destroyed and will go through anything and anybody to make this happen, while the vegan werewolves are equally as passionate about protecting the child and ending their perceived curse.  Who, pray tell, will come out on top in this epic battle?


Part ‘Howling’ and part a bunch of other flicks, the hardcore will immediately be disappointed with ‘Skinwalkers’ even before they walk into the theater because of it’s PG-13 rating, and I’m afraid I must agree with the hardcore on this one after actually seeing the film.  Something is implicitly wrong with a werewolf movie that has a bunch of hacking, slashing, goring shotgun blasting, neck chewing and disemboweling and then cutting away from it so you can’t see it.  I’m certainly no gore hound, but this IS a werewolf flick and that stuff probably should be in there.  Also, this movie had some of the baddest bitches… errr… loveliest women in existence, complete with a howlingesque werewolf love sequence featuring Natassia Malthe that was also decidedly PG-13 in its presentation.  Oh for shame. 


However, despite the lack of overt gore and gratuitous nudity, I liked ‘Skinwalkers’ if for no other reason than director James Isaac kept his flick entertaining throughout with brisk, well paced story telling, quick editing and well conceived action sequences.  The werewolf narrative was a reasonably interesting take on this well worn storyline and the director did a good job of deflecting whatever the secret of Timothy’s thirteenth birthday was until the conclusion, leading one to believe that there could be a ‘Skinwalkers 2’ if this movie is even mildly successful.  The acting was certainly competent for a movie in this genre and actress Rhona Mitra is certainly easy to look at for ninety minutes or so.  Apparently Ms. Mitra has a side gig of going to comic-cons and dressing up as the character of Lara Croft.  Now I’m not really one for comic conventions and dressing up as a storm trooper or anything, but Rhona Mitra in a Lara Croft costume may be something I have to see before the actress becomes to big to continue that gig.


Yes, perhaps the world could do without another werewolf movie, but then a few less romantic comedies wouldn’t be so bad either.  I found ‘Skinwalkers’ reasonably entertaining, but now I’m off to find out where the hell the next comic-con is going to be held and I need to press my ‘Dark Night’ costume.  Later for y’all.

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