strip search, cavity search, showers…
Unfortunately this is the good news for our girls, with the
bad news being that Saldeen's prison is just a mid-point to
white slavery… after he's thoroughly 'checked them out' of
course.
As you might imagine this prison isn't so hot for the girls
but it's particularly problematic for the bountiful Bonnie
who's gravity defying boobs have not only caught attention of
Warden Saladeen, they have also piqued the interest of top
yard bitch Hellena (Toni Naples) who has made it her life
mission to rape poor Bonnie, as if the warden isn't doing that
enough at the already.
After Colleen, the defacto leader of the group considering she
does look like a slightly more masculine version of Keanu
Reeves, if Keanu had really nice boobs, which he might have
because I can't recall seeing Keanu with his shirt off… uh…
where was I? Oh yeah, After Colleen has a chance meeting
in solitary with Sarah, Sarah informs Colleen that she's about
to be sold into slavery, every orifice will be raped, she will
be branded like a farm cow, infected with every STD known to
exist, and then tossed away to die… as you can see Sarah is
kind of a Negative Nellie… Colleen figures the girls'
gotta get the hell out of there. But how? If you
put together the fortuitous appearance of a key to the
facility, then tossed in a little girl on girl action,
combined with the fortuitous appearance of a firearm… then you
guessed it! It's not going to be an easy escape but I do
foresee four 1990's era hot chicks singing 'Oh Susannah' all
the way back home.
We probably shouldn't be giving Joel Silberg too much credit
for the rousing success that is his WIP epic 'Prison Heat'
because this is one genre that is really difficult to screw
up. I mean it's been done, but it's hard. All you
really need is a group of women who agree to get naked, a
venue to stage a group shower scene, and some loon to play the
warden and you are set! You barely need a script since
it's pretty much been written already! I'm pleased to
say that 'Prison Heat' got these basics down though ultra
pretty Kena Land apparently refused to get naked. Of
course we at the FCU decry the gratuitous exploitation of
women in these kinds of movies, but yet this tragic oversight
made me very sad.
True enough there's not a lot that's unique about 'Prison
Heat' aside from the rousing rendition of 'Oh Susannah', but
our director does seem to be in complete harmony with the kind
of movie that he is making. The story is negligible and
completely nonsensical, but it does keep things moving forward
at a brisk pace, and on the occasions that it does look like
the story is about to slow down, Mr. Silberg made sure that
Lori Jo Hendrix took a shower, got her shirt ripped off, or
got raped which always seemed to jump start everything.
It was like magic.
It is a WIP flick so it does have its fair share of stupidity,
in particular I did notice the girls got to keep their
belongings, like Michelle got to keep her acoustic
guitar. From where I was sitting that guitar equaled six
garottes and upon shattering, and endless supply of
shanks. But then that's just me thinking all violent and
stuff.
Of course 'Prison Heat' isn't a legitimately good movie, and
to tell you the truth I don't want to see a WIP that's
legitimately good because that would mean I would seriously
have to soul search and protest the horrible treatment of
these women in these movies, when all we really to see is hot
chicks take showers and make a run for it. I mean… not
me… but for some that's all they want. 'Prison Heat'
makes this happen.
