Reviewed by

Christopher Armstead

Curiously enough when the screening came around for the ‘Sex and the City’ movie, I totally blew that off because why in the hell would I want to see that? Let’s allow some woman on the staff see that film, one who would certainly appreciate it more than I would, but yet there I was sitting in the middle of a theater watching ‘Miss Conception’. Why didn’t I blow this off… oh why oh why didn’t I blow this one off? Is it because Heather Graham is hotter than those four women from Sex in the City combined? Is it because Mia Kirshner is even hotter than Heather Graham and all four on those women from Sex in the City combined? Is it because I’ve seen both of these women naked before in their earlier film lives and perhaps it played into mind on some kind of base subconscious level? Why oh why oh why didn’t I blow this one off too?

Taking place in Britain with all British characters, including the always lovely Ms. Graham who’s actually from Wisconsin, she assumes the role of Georgina, a construction site foreman or something whose biological clock is ticking like a time bomb. Mix a woman’s declining fertility with other women around her having babies and it’s a toxic concoction indeed, particularly when all this woman wants to do in life is have a baby. Zak (Tom Ellis) is Georgina’s somewhat irresponsible filmmaker boyfriend who possesses no biological clock and as such is in no hurry to have a baby. This slight disconnect causes a fracture between our formerly happy couple with Georgina telling Zak to hit the road. All this baby stuff has gotten Georgina all concerned about her own viability so she goes with her very best friend Clem (Kirshner) to one of those fertility clinics where the doctor delivers her the bad news that she has one ovary left and if that ovulation starts without somebody putting a seed in that egg, no baby for Georgina ever.

Now Georgina is in a rut and she would like to have a baby with her now ex-boyfriend but he’s off in Ireland somewhere shooting a documentary with his hot assistant. This places the lovely young, but early menopausal, woman in a bit of situation as she has four days of ovulation, she wants a baby more than anything in the world and, at the

risk of being crude, she needs to find a way to get some semen up in her. Actually I just re-read that and that was pretty damn crude. Regardless one would think that a woman who looks like Georgina would haven’t that difficult a time finding a warm sperm donor but how surprised you would be as London seems to be overrun with gay men, infertile men, more gay men and grifters. About the grifter… I under stand that you’re a criminal and all and just want to rob somebody but Good Lord Man! Look at her! Go ahead and knock that off then steal the money after she falls asleep. At least that’s what I woulda done… if I was in the business of robbing half dressed horny women that is. Which actually doesn’t seem like a half bad line of work. Anyway by this time Zak has discovered the error of his insensitive ways and just wants his woman back including the opportunity to plant his life giving seed inside of her but alas he might be too late as that biological clock is about to strike twelve. But that doesn’t mean that they still shouldn’t try… like every freaking night… at least that’s what I would do.

Surprisingly enough I didn’t hate ‘Miss Conception’. Sure I was sitting in the theater wondering why I was watching a movie, all by myself no less, about a woman with one ovary – the latest in a long list of movies about single women having babies as the Right to Life organization has apparently taken over the movie business, but after watching this flick, it didn’t make me want to gouge my eyes out. That’s not to say that I liked the movie because it was painfully predictable, horribly derivative, it was a romantic comedy that was severely lacking in both romance and comedy, and director Eric Styles insisted on trying to convince us that Heather Graham can’t trick a man into sexing her up. I’m not buying into that. Ever.

Now what I did like about the movie, the thing that keeps mr from absolutely hating it and myself for watching it is that both Graham and Kirshner are quite charming in it, and though neither of them are British I didn’t find their fake accents to terribly distracting, and as characters they were adorably engaging. Who knew that there were no viable British actresses that that this movie couldn’t use, thus requiring them to import a couple of North Americans. Though I probably could have gone without seeing this, and the world probably could have done without yet another undercooked and contrived ‘I need / have / want a baby’ romantic comedy, if you want to see Heather Graham walk around in her underwear for bit and look Mia Kirsner’s cute chin dimple for ninety minutes or so, then by all means have at it.

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