Decisions, decisions, decisions. Do I put the box cover up with actress Lauren Lee Smith tastefully wearing a bra or do I choose the one with her left titty exposed, though the nipple is inexplicably blurred out which is kind of silly. As if there was ever any real choice. At least the box cover didn’t have a shot actor Eric Balfour’s ass, which was displayed so prominently and so often in director Clement Virgo’s ‘Lie With Me’ that I can safely say that if the next time I see the man's behind is sometime after the twelfth of never, it will be too soon. I use that line often, but I think it’s more than appropriate. Now about ‘Lie With Me’ I’m not quite sure what Virgo was attempting to accomplish with his film about cracked people talking dirty, playing with themselves and who screw a lot other than making me watch cracked people talk dirty, play with themselves and screw.

As our film opens Leila (Smith) is watching porn and playing with herself. Leila narrates to us that there is nothing in her background such as molestation, child abuse or incest that has had any particular affect on her, she just likes to screw. A lot. One day while heading out to one her favorite haunts to find somebody to screw, she runs into David (Balfour) and the two have an instant attraction to each other. If David knew what we knew he would have just grabbed her by the arm, taken her home and screwed her since in a comparison of things that are more difficult, between say inhaling oxygen and picking up Leila, it’s a toss up. Regardless, the pair play a little game of hide and seek at the club with Leila eventually taking some poor guy outside and screwing him in front of David while he watches her from his car screwing his soon to be ex-girlfriend. Outstanding.

After that little incident the pair will see each other on the street and play their own little silly game of genitalia keep-a-way until eventually they go ahead and get on down.

They get down repeatedly and often, usually in plain sight of Virgo’s intrusive camera for all to see. Their relationship is a passionate one but there are issues such as David having to care for his dying father, Leila attempting to deal with her parents splitting up, David’s ex-girlfriend showing up at Leila’s job informing her that David sucks as a boyfriend and Leila’s lone friend describing to the girl how she’s screwing her ex-boyfriend and allowing him to splay his babymakers across her face, though she’s marrying some other dude in a couple of days. Outstanding.

However, even though this pair has pledged undying love to each other, though they barely know each others names, there are problems such as David believing his true love is a ‘slut’ – and why he would think that I don’t know, and Leila believing that this man she has known all of a week, who has begged her never to leave him, is a bit on the clingy side. Well somehow this pair of lustful misfits will have to work through these issues and find true love because they obviously have so much in common, which as far as I can see is the lone fact that their genitalia apparently fits well together. Outstanding.

I don’t know quite what to tell you all about this one here because I don’t know what the point of it was. Was it to titillate? I don’t discard that because Smith and Balfour certainly went to places with each other that most actors rarely go – at least from film companies not in Van Nuys California - and they seemed to have a good time going there. I don’t know whether the sex was real or simulated but there were some things in this that simply can’t be faked, at least I don’t think so. I don’t know if this film was intended be a study of pair of characters, because not enough info was given about these characters. Why does Leila behave the way she does? Because her parents are divorcing? Hell, that’s almost as common as breaking a nail and does little to help us understand Leila’s sexual pathology, and trust me, picking up men you don’t know and screwing them in public places is pathological behavior. David’s stout neediness can possibly attributed to him spending his days caring for his sick father and thus needing somebody to submit to him completely at the end of the day, but his ex-girlfriend seemed to being doing just that just fine and as such gave me little insight on his extreme fascination with Leila, who truth be told didn’t seem to much to offer in the way of overt beauty, intelligence and she didn’t even have enough money to buy decent underwear. The only thing she seemed to have to offer was easy sex, which dude was getting already. I guess it’s just chemistry.

‘Lie With Me’ isn’t a bad movie at all, it’s just one that I didn’t really understand the purpose of. The film Virgo made after this one, ‘Poor Boy’s Game’, which I saw before this one and will get around to writing a review of someday, is a far more focused film with crisper characters and a more solid narrative, and it is on the strength of his work in that film that ‘Lie With Me’ made it into my cue. ‘Lie With Me’ does have some interesting concepts within it’s running time that may make it worth seeing, but it does feel like a movie that doesn’t have anything worthwhile to say.