I don’t know much, but I do know that if I were to ever make a movie and I can’t get hot women to be in my movie then I’m a loser. Take this movie ‘Consignment’ for instance, which really isn’t all that great though it does have some potential floating around in it’s 80 or so minute body, but even if you should find the movie completely intolerable, you will still watch just to see who may show up in a string bikini this time, or might get all nekkid next time. To writer / director Sid Kali allow me to say that I’m not sold on your ability as a legitimate filmmaker, but if you keep up with the one thing I know you can do, which is convince hotties to get naked in your movies, you are on the verge of being one of my new heroes.

Tommy (Tim Beechum) is trying to get out of the game. Now I’m a bit confused early on because Tommy drives up to stop some dude from getting beat up, though I don’t know why other than this must be something Tommy just likes to do in his spare time. Anyway, two other dudes drive up, shoot the dude that’s doing the beating and grab Tommy. They take Tommy’s money, then Tommy makes break for it. Next thing I know we’re being introduced to Detroit Mike (James E. Hurd) who has one of these dudes that grabbed Tommy tied up and puts a bullet through his skull. I’m guessing Detroit Mike is upset because he didn’t kill Tommy, but the other dude didn’t kill Tommy either but he all of the sudden becomes Detroit Mike’s number one boy. I’m confused. Anyway Tommy goes home to his new wife Yolanda (Stream Gardener) and she encourages him that they need to get out of Virginia and head to SoCal for a fresh new start. Tommy is cool with that because in the first ten minutes of this thing Detroit Mike has killed three people and raped somebody, who he subsequently killed… basically in pursuit of killing Tommy for no other reason than Tommy wants out.

Now in Cali, Tommy moves in with his drug dealing cousin Carmello (Jerome Anthony Hawkins) who is a little bit on the crazy side. Tommy claims he wants ‘out of the game’ but he sure ain’t trying all that hard. Eventually Tommy hooks up with the husband of one of Yolanda’s old friends who supplies Tommy with product to move, which Tommy does so well that he gains the attention of this cats boss Moses (Walter Pagan) who wants Tommy to start moving product for him, driving him even deeper into the game that claims he wants out of. Then all kinds of crazy stuff starts happening with Hell’s Angels getting capped, unfaithful wives, drug dealers getting offed, lap dances, family strife, dirty under cover cops, and okey-doke deals. Eventually things get so messed up in SoCal that Tommy has to contemplate heading back to Virginia, but unfortunately there’s a murderous lunatic back at the crib just waiting…

The main problem with ‘Consignment’ was that the story was just entirely too disjointed to totally immerse yourself into it. Kali’s script had things, and people, and situations coming at you from all over the place and too often there was very little clarity in these situations which made parts of the narrative difficult to follow, and what you could keep track of often made little or no sense. The character of Tommy was way too inconsistent, as on one hand we’re told he wants ‘out of the game’, but on the other hand he seems to be doing everything he can to stay in the game, and his pacifist attitude towards ‘the game’ seem completely out of place. Actor Tim Beechum also seemed out of place playing the role of Tommy, especially when we see the characters he’s surrounded by. He came off more as some kind of social worker or old school Speakeasy owner than the methodical business minded drug dealer we were supposed to be seeing. Not that I know anything about casting a movie but I think I would have opted for Jerome Anthony Hawkins, who played the role of Carmello for the role of Tommy, because he seemed like he would have a much better fit and seemed to be a better actor. But who the hell am I? There were some decent performances in this though with the afore mentioned Jerome Anthony Hawkins, Walter Pagan who made a rather smooth criminal out of Moses and of course James L. Hurd as the completely out of his shite character of Detroit Mike. If the dial for making a character as crazy as humanly possible goes to ten, then James L. Hurd found eleven and cranked it up.

As far as women possessing hotness, they were all over the place in this flick as we must send a special shout out to Joanna Hernandez who played the stripper Paris and gave us a rather lengthy, albeit completely unnecessary lap dance scene. Completely unnecessary. Then we have the pool scene which had to have been a crew favorite as it was certainly one of mine, and even Stream Gardner as the loyal wife, yeah she might not be the best actress on the block she probably had a rack tighter than all of them… shame she didn’t get naked for us, though she did take a bubble bath early in the movie which only served to tease us. Let’s not even get started on the DVD extras and the scenes my man had to leave on the cutting room floor, for whatever reason. Well, one reason was that one particular cutie couldn’t remember a line to save her beautiful life, but it’s not like her replacement was chopped liver. Outstanding.

Not that any of that is a recommendation that you run out see this movie as it was certainly flawed beyond repair with its fractured narrative and somewhat suspect performances, I’m just saying that it does have its upside. That’s all I’m saying.